Animal Attack

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David let out a roar, “AHHH!” as he slammed the weight back onto the squat rack. 150 pounds, that’s a new personal record, congratulations David. Last week David was doing a mere 140-pound back squat, how is he getting SO strong SO quick? It’s because he’s an addict, his drug of choice? Workout supplements. David is not the only one that has to rely on a supplement to boost his will power and add that extra pump to make him feel stronger. Millions of people have turned to the supplements; Creatine, No-Xplode, protein, and Jack-3d are just a handful of the thousands of products flying off the shelves each day. People now take them before, during and after their workout. They’re absolutely reliant on them, unable to exercise without drinking a sugary red substance shaken in an overpriced water bottle. Here are some tips on how to know whether or not workout supplements are controlling your life.

1. The brand “Animal Attack” sounds appealing to you
You’re young chubby lad looking to change your ways and get in shape. You decide to take a trip to the local GNC to purchase some supplements. Unsure of what to buy, the brand “Animal Attack” catches your attention. You begin to daydream; the kid who bullied you in high school begins to pick on you. Little does he know you’ve been drinking Animal Attack. You lunge at the bully and defeat him with a swift swipe of your paw, and with that, you’re sold.

Why wouldn’t you want to pay $70 for 7 servings of Animal Attack?!

2. You cannot sleep
1 cup of coffee has approximately 80mg of caffeine per serving. 1 scoop of the brand No-Xplode contains about 100mg of caffeine. On average, people are taking anywhere between 2-3 scoops of No-Xplode for their workout.

Knowledge drop!

3. You’ve built a tolerance
Like a drug addict unable to rediscover that first high, you’ve begun to build a tolerance to your supplement. People are taking more and more of their supplements to feel the same way they did on day 1 when they felt like an animal attacking the gym.

It’s heartbreaking (not really) to see these people cheating their way to the goals they set. Do they know that it cannot last forever? What happens when you finally call it quits and put the supplements down? Your body will deflate down to its normal size, like a dumb balloon without air, flaccid rubber and lacking personality. So to David and everyone alike, put down the supplements and get fit the old fashioned way.