Global Warming Cuts Prostitute Paychecks

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Global warming and increasing temperatures will cause decreasing birthrates and lower paychecks for prostitutes. Researchers have released a study that suggests that higher temperatures make for lower sex drives.

The study, conducted by the National Bureau of Economic Research, found that birth rates have had a tremendous decline nine months after a particularly hot day, going down as much as 0.7% as cooler days. From this they drew two conclusions: either heat reduces fertility or less desire to have sex. The team also found that days with temperatures exceeding 80 degrees result in a significant decline in birth rate 8-10 months later, though they rebound after a few months.
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Global warming will likely bring more summer births than any other season of the year, and this expose bring children to more potentially hazardous temperatures, and the birth rate rebound observe isn’t enough to compensate for the drops. Researchers recommend the use of air conditioning to keep sex drive alive between couples.

So what does this mean for the sex workers of the world? A move to cooler countries, perhaps, or an excellent air conditioning system. Though there is only so much that can be controlled, the team recommends that people remain healthily cool as to keep their libido stable and birth rates high so global warming doesn’t claim this aspect of daily life as well .