Growing old is not easy! We often forget that the same adventurous spirit of those who are younger than fifty remains in those who are edging up to ninety-two. It’s the body that keeps many adventurers at heart from doing what they always loved to do.
I remember as my mother got older she always used to lament that she could no longer do what she did when she was younger. It always seemed to me that she felt she no longer had the value that she did when she was a young woman. I would always assure her that she was very valued whether she could still contribute to life as she had when she was younger or not. As I’ve grown older myself, I have watched with a sad heart as many of the precious, spunky and adventurous older people I have known were, and are, set aside by their loved ones and forgotten.
A Special Christmas with Kids at Heart from Fifty to Ninety-two
This year, I and a couple of other friends celebrated Christmas and New Year’s traditions with several of our elderly, and now single, friends. Each of their situations is different. Some have very supportive family members but have lost spouses (two very recently this year), others have no family at all. Let me share the stories of 3 of these incredible adventurers. Their names will be different to protect their privacy.
Emma and John, Kids at Heart in Their Late Seventies
A year ago, Emma and John, both retired teachers, had recently returned from a trip and cruise to Hawaii. They combined cruising the Hawaiian Islands with visiting their granddaughter who lives on Oahu. Each year their travels would take them on at least 2 adventures and they would return with lots of pictures and anecdotes. Little did they realize at the time that the Hawaiian trip would be their last.
Early this year, John was diagnosed with a rare degenerative lung disease. By spring, they were making plans to sell their home and move into assisted living to make it easier for John.
One Sunday in April, Emma began to have an excruciating headache and was rushed to the hospital. Tests showed that she was having a brain bleed (a stroke). The bleed was so severe that she could have died. Instead it left her with speech and balance difficulties. She is now in a wheelchair.
In early November, John’s lung condition had gotten so bad that he passed away. At the funeral, Emma’s first words to me were, “I can’t drive anymore. I don’t know what we will do for Christmas Eve.” For the last several Christmases, she and John had invited me and a friend to join them at a favorite restaurant to celebrate Christmas. This year, when we told Emma that we planned to take her to that restaurant to celebrate, she lit up like a Christmas tree. Emma’s spirit is amazing. She even had gifts that she and John had accumulated over the year for each one of us.
Gabriella and Her Family Tradition
Gabriella is from Lebanon. She emigrated from Lebanon with her husband many years ago. She has amazing stories of how she and her husband left Lebanon to begin a new life in America. Gabriella is now in her late sixties and for the last several years she has been a widow. She still lives in the home that she and her husband bought when they moved south from Boston.
Last year, Gabriella included me and my friend for their traditional Lebanese Christmas Eve celebration. Her brother and his family traveled south from Boston, and her daughter and her family, along with nieces and nephews, gathered at Gabriella’s house. She’s a great cook and had prepared a special feast for the occasion. This year, there were 18 of us celebrating.
On New Year’s Day, we gathered at my house for more Christmastime cheer with other seniors who did not have to be lonely this New Year’s Day. When we give back I have learned that we are the ones who are blessed. So, for this Christmas season, we joined our special elderly friends and helped bring out the kids at heart in them. Now we are planning more sharing events for the winter months. Why don’t you do the same?
