Your worst nightmare has come true while camping. Upon hearing low muffled growls and the sound of rustling leaves, you nervously leave the comfort of your tent, only to find yourself staring straight into the eyes of a 4-feet tall, 300-pound bear. You’ve never been religious, but unconsciously, you begin to recite an incorrect, but highly creative version of the Lord’s Prayer.
It’s a silent standoff – and you’ve been holding you’re breath for over a minute now.
If only you had taken the necessary steps to prevent a bear from finding your campsite. Or better yet, it’s never to late to learn how to fight a bear. Here’s how:
1. Make as much noise as possible
Bang pots and pans if you have to – noise, and especially loud noises, scare bears. If you have a radio, crank that baby up to full volume and watch the bear’s reaction as you sing along to the “Billboard Top 100”. For all you other hardcore, nature loving, technology-hating type of outdoors people, yelling or whistling will also do.
2. Act aggressively
Be aggressive; create a scene. This is not the time to be self-conscious. Dancing like an idiot might be off-putting, but it will also confuse the heck out of the bear.
3. Make yourself appear bigger
In order to intimidate the bear, you want to make yourself appear much bigger than you actually are. A simple way to do this is to raise your hands up in the air over your head. For those shorter folks out there, swinging a jacket or scarf might come in handy if your arm span isn’t too large.
4. And if all else fails, RUN.
Run, run, RUN – but have the common sense that a bear is bigger than you and can therefore run faster. Resort to running if that’s the only option left, but remember to keep away from steep hills, inclines or rocky areas. And if you happen to be camping with a friend, just outrun him or her.
