Yes, this is a serious question, and yes, it is, in fact, a reality. Unlike Spiderman or Batman, a new hero has emerged in the modern realm of man that may actually help save us from disasters. Of course, this can be no other than a Compressible Robot with Articulated Mechanisms (CRAM). Inspired by the universally hated cockroach, CRAM seeks to mimic the superhero-like traits of agility and strength in order to save the world.
HOW THE CRAM STACKS UP AGAINST SPIDERMAN
Both spiderman and the cockroach robot are bug related. Fact. Which one would actually make a better superhero though? The stats speak for themselves. As you know the cockroach is a tough critter to kill. If you’ve ever tried to catch one, let alone hit one, you should have some idea of this concept. Cockroaches can withstand 900 times their bodyweight without getting hurt. To put things in perspective, that’s a 200+ pound man withstanding ninety tons. I’m not completely sure about Spiderman’s capabilities, but I’m fairly certain the roach wins in this one. The CRAM may not be able to swing around New York or kiss upside down in the rain like Spiderman but apparently it only costs $100 to make, so that’s nice.
LIKE BATMAN, COCKROACH ROBOT USES TECHNOLOGICAL ADVANTAGES
As we all know, Bruce Wayne/Batman has no super powers. What he does have, is heaps of money. Money to buy technology that will fight crime. The CRAM isn’t too far off from our caped crusader. With an impressive array of cameras, microphones, and other sensors, this cockroach robot has almost enough technology to put Batman to shame. Almost. That being said, these features will strategically help the robot analyze disasters and locate victims by seeing through small cracks. Batman would probably blow something up in the process.
THE COCKROACH IS THE HERO WE DESERVE
We would all love Spiderman and Batman to be a reality I’m sure, but mankind is just not ready for that kind of hero. What we need is a hero for the common man. What we need is a cockroach robot. We’ve sure given this insect a hard time over the years and now it is time to humble ourselves. Next time you find yourself inside a collapsed building, you’ll see a tiny robotic cockroach crawling through the crevices saving your life. Maybe then we’ll begin to give this bug the respect it deserves.
